First of all, I want to shout out Cornell Bhangra and Pao Bhangra.
Now for my review
This past weekend, we were stationed in Bumblef**k, Ithaca. The churail at the front desk of the hotel was nice, she had a thing for one of our teammates. Sadly, due to the overpacking of males in our kamra, she could not get it in, but that did not stop her from chasing said member. The lady also called 2 male police strippers to our initial room on floor six, and tried to have us removed in a kinky fashion. We fought. We won. Anyways, badaam khaana? Ok back to topic. So Friday night, we went to the mixer to mix. We were taunted by unknown people of the committee and were threatened to be kicked out of the competition for disorderly conduct. We still fucked shit up. Any and every girl with a balloon was getting popped. So we played games, they were fun but racist. Why was every group given a different color balloon? How about tie dye balloons next time? Fast forward, we made it to our room and were bombarded with stacks of water bottles. Due to the excess water in our room, the beds were flooded. After many shots of water, some of our teammates got very emotional and asked "What about the kids in Africa? Ohnu pani di lorh aa." That night, we cried as a team and filled every empty bottle with our tears and UPSed it to Africa. We love you. Every morning in the confinement of our room, we were given a morsel of bread and a cow was escorted to our room for fresh squeezing. Many touched it, the milk not the cow. After 10 minutes, our cow was nowhere to be found. Now, i don't like to point my ungli, but TAG did it. Their team walked in to the afterparty with "fresh" hamburgers for everyone. They seduced our vegetarian dost Toshi Jatt to indulge in one of these burgers. He now is stationed at Lilavati Podhiar Medical Center undergoing treatment for Mad Cow Disease. Thanks TAG, we like you too. Next shenanigan, our team decided to pull a harmless little prank, or as you would call it, a "PANJ". We superglued all rival team members to chairs and various other items, and it even got to a point where we glued one of our own members (Amandeep Cheema, ladies don't add him) and Sanjana Biswas ( some girl we know ). They could not be separated with or without the glue. After this prank was complete, the judges came to our room in white robes and lalkaare maared outside our door until we opened. Once we opened, we were informed that the highest score we would receive was a 1. We were satisfied. The churail at the front desk helped the glued dancers break free and beat us to a pulp. That night, out of anger, I hooked up with a fat chick. A simple request for a bottle of water led to statutory rape. I called my mom, she cried. We ran around looking for the judges in the white robes to get our score sheets, instead, we were given a gift basket full of t shirts made by minorities in third world countries and stolen granola bars. We had to pay for the basket. This distracted us for a while. After th e after party, there was a after party. What does that even mean? Why is there a party after the party? Moving on, many kudiyan were touched that night, which sparked the phrase "Jatt Di Juthi A Day, Brings the Kuthi Jananis Our Way". We saw. We conquered. We came.
. So anyways, raat gayi toh baat gayi. Hum ne bola, ous ne khola. That was this then, this is now.. Pao.
Anyway, shout out to everyone that came out, and especially to those who went in. Sick weekend. SPECIAL SHOUT OUT TO ANIL PRASAD OF DESI DHAMAKA AND BHANGRA ALL-STARS. THANKS FOR PAYING US THE MONEY YOU OWED US. YOU REALLY HELPED US OUT BROTHER. CAN'T WAIT FOR YOUR NEXT COMPETITION. Congrats to the placing teams, thanks for my signing my shirt and I would like to extend my deepest thanks to everyone for a great weekend.
Now for my review
This past weekend, we were stationed in Bumblef**k, Ithaca. The churail at the front desk of the hotel was nice, she had a thing for one of our teammates. Sadly, due to the overpacking of males in our kamra, she could not get it in, but that did not stop her from chasing said member. The lady also called 2 male police strippers to our initial room on floor six, and tried to have us removed in a kinky fashion. We fought. We won. Anyways, badaam khaana? Ok back to topic. So Friday night, we went to the mixer to mix. We were taunted by unknown people of the committee and were threatened to be kicked out of the competition for disorderly conduct. We still fucked shit up. Any and every girl with a balloon was getting popped. So we played games, they were fun but racist. Why was every group given a different color balloon? How about tie dye balloons next time? Fast forward, we made it to our room and were bombarded with stacks of water bottles. Due to the excess water in our room, the beds were flooded. After many shots of water, some of our teammates got very emotional and asked "What about the kids in Africa? Ohnu pani di lorh aa." That night, we cried as a team and filled every empty bottle with our tears and UPSed it to Africa. We love you. Every morning in the confinement of our room, we were given a morsel of bread and a cow was escorted to our room for fresh squeezing. Many touched it, the milk not the cow. After 10 minutes, our cow was nowhere to be found. Now, i don't like to point my ungli, but TAG did it. Their team walked in to the afterparty with "fresh" hamburgers for everyone. They seduced our vegetarian dost Toshi Jatt to indulge in one of these burgers. He now is stationed at Lilavati Podhiar Medical Center undergoing treatment for Mad Cow Disease. Thanks TAG, we like you too. Next shenanigan, our team decided to pull a harmless little prank, or as you would call it, a "PANJ". We superglued all rival team members to chairs and various other items, and it even got to a point where we glued one of our own members (Amandeep Cheema, ladies don't add him) and Sanjana Biswas ( some girl we know ). They could not be separated with or without the glue. After this prank was complete, the judges came to our room in white robes and lalkaare maared outside our door until we opened. Once we opened, we were informed that the highest score we would receive was a 1. We were satisfied. The churail at the front desk helped the glued dancers break free and beat us to a pulp. That night, out of anger, I hooked up with a fat chick. A simple request for a bottle of water led to statutory rape. I called my mom, she cried. We ran around looking for the judges in the white robes to get our score sheets, instead, we were given a gift basket full of t shirts made by minorities in third world countries and stolen granola bars. We had to pay for the basket. This distracted us for a while. After th e after party, there was a after party. What does that even mean? Why is there a party after the party? Moving on, many kudiyan were touched that night, which sparked the phrase "Jatt Di Juthi A Day, Brings the Kuthi Jananis Our Way". We saw. We conquered. We came.
. So anyways, raat gayi toh baat gayi. Hum ne bola, ous ne khola. That was this then, this is now.. Pao.Anyway, shout out to everyone that came out, and especially to those who went in. Sick weekend. SPECIAL SHOUT OUT TO ANIL PRASAD OF DESI DHAMAKA AND BHANGRA ALL-STARS. THANKS FOR PAYING US THE MONEY YOU OWED US. YOU REALLY HELPED US OUT BROTHER. CAN'T WAIT FOR YOUR NEXT COMPETITION. Congrats to the placing teams, thanks for my signing my shirt and I would like to extend my deepest thanks to everyone for a great weekend.
